SHMO MONEY™

Official Baby Rage Research Division
BABY RAGE ALERT: WATCHING CLOSELY
Preamble from the baby rage desk

Shmo's baby rage is escalating.

Recent field reports indicate an unusually high concentration of dramatic sighs, controller blame, “I’m logging off” declarations, and world-class pouting. This dashboard documents every baby-rage incident before the situation becomes financially unmanageable.

Angry baby rage mascot wearing a gaming headset

Live baby-rage clock

NAP TIME
00:00.0
The nursery is quiet. Start timing the instant Shmo enters his tiny-yet-thunderous baby-rage era.

Baby-rage incident report

TINY EMERGENCY
Total tiny tantrums00the nursery has receipts
Baby-rage minutes0mtime spent emotionally unavailable
Average pout power—out of 5 emergency rattles
Top blame target—most likely to ruin nap time

Baby-rage intensity history

MINUTES
No baby-rage incidents recorded. Either Shmo is well-rested or witnesses are protecting him.

Nursery incident log

0 REPORTS
  • No little rage reports yet. The pacifier is holding.